Possession is one of the most subtle but most destructive forces we deal with. To truly walk your own path, you must also be aware of the paths pretending to be yours as well.

When I speak of possession, I mean in the sense that something has taken over your body and mind. You see it often in media, possession being a horror concept, be it a movie, a book, a game, a show etc. Usually depicted as a demon or a spirit taking over someone’s body or someone’s house or other belongings. The Exorcist (1973) is an excellent movie, and probably the gold standard or what most discussion about possession would stem from, directly or indirectly. But I want to take on a new angle on possession. One more detailed, one much much more subtle, that can get anyone, if it hasn’t gotten everyone at some point in time already.

So first it must be understood how the body and mind both work together, how actions are performed, and how thoughts in the mind come about. When we observe the body’s actions, we call that behavior. And what drives behavior is our mind. Now there are conscious behaviors, this is what we decide to do, and unconscious behaviors, what our body’s will do on it’s own. Point being, your body can and will operate with or without your involvement. Things like driving, where we’ve trained our bodies to get to work without being completely mindful of it, boxers that dodge off of instinct, even simply getting up to walk to do something, you don’t need to think about it, its an unconscious action.

Just like your body is naturally reactive to what’s going on around it and what’s happening to it, so are our minds. But the body’s unconscious actions came about through training and repetitive actions, building a physical memory it can recall an instant because it has been reinforced over and over again. Our minds do this as well, with mental memories (what we usually refer to when speaking about a memory we’ve had). How much and how often we think about something, reinforces how we feel and how we react to it. If you are afraid of the snakes, you will not (or try not to) do things that involve snakes. In this sense, snakes have some control over your actions because the fear you have for them limit what are willing to do. But the consequences of that, are largely something you don’t mind dealing with. So, so what? We all have fears, that does not mean we are possessed. Except when the fear is yourself, this works a bit differently. Because working around yourself only ends up with you going in circles.

Now in order to be possessed, there must be manipulation. Manipulation, in and of itself, is not inherently bad, evil, or unhealthy. The farmer manipulates the soil to grow crops. A band manipulates their instruments to play music. Manipulation is a skill, a skill in which you act upon something to achieve a desired result. When we manipulate the very world around us, every day, from tools and machines to simply breathing, inhaling and exhaling, manipulating the very air around us to serve ourselves.

Manipulating things (depending on your world view) that are classified as inanimate, nonliving, is one thing. But we can also manipulate the living. Sometimes we call it training, sometimes we call it coaching, sometimes we call it raising a child. In these instances, the two parties have an understanding of the relationship and are allowing themselves to be acted upon. And we call bad manipulation, abuse, and good manipulation, guidance. You can be taught wrong, and go out and do the wrong thing because you allowed yourself to learn from someone doing it wrong. What is a growing child, who is full of wonder, ready to learn and experiment to do? There will hopefully come a time where self awareness will teach you to be more mindful of who you learn from and how and what you put in practice.

But that kind of manipulation is not possession, because the one being manipulated still has some control over their actions in those situations. The possession I speak of is manipulating someone when they lose that control and have surrendered their behavior to another. The things you do, the things you believe that you don’t have your own reason to. This can scale from Religious and Government bodies, all the way down to your Friends and Family. To the point where they can have you live a life that is not yours because you have grown a fear of going against them, sacrificing who you are, for their benefit.

To keep it generic, the father that worked his whole life to run a potato business because that was his dream, that was his passion. He has a son and raises him to take his place and keep the family going. But his son has no passion for potatoes. His son really wants to build ships, that’s his passion. This scenario is extremely common, just exchange the businesses, the passions, and genders as you please. If the son decides to live his fathers dream, that is how manipulation becomes possession. If the son decides to follow his own dreams and dive into his own passions, this is freedom. And this freedom was gained by the son being self aware of his own path, being aware of the path he was being manipulated to follow, and the willingness to go against the manipulation/fear.

If you do not know where you want to go then the only path forward you’ll see is the one that was made for you and you won’t give yourself the option to feel free. If you are not aware of the path you were manipulated to follow, then simply enough, you can be manipulated to follow it. You can be told that that is the way to your happiness, when really it’s a trap. And lastly you have to be brave enough to be yourself, so you can go down your own path, because when you are in a possessive situation, you will always be met with resistance.

And because possession is an extension of manipulation, it is also not inherently bad, evil, or unhealthy. It is simply, what we surrender our control to. Abuse can make you surrender. Many of us surrender to our traumas every day. The snake that you are afraid of, you do not surrender to it, because it is not part of who you are. Manipulation may take a path away from you, but Possession will take all paths away from you. To be possessed by your own passions is a beautiful thing because you have discovered your own way and surrendered into that. But to be possessed by someone else’s passions will lead to unfulfillment and bitterness. Be mindful of every step you take and make sure you are walking a path made for you

Love, iLL